Born & gone a little too early!

Usually, start of every month, things that come to my mind are credit card payment, rent payment – basically all things financial. But things changed drastically after Ayden’s birth & death.

Ayden was born on June 2 and passed away on July 1. 1st & 2nd of every month doesn’t bring me joy of the credited salary. Instead, they are just a reminder of ‘my son would have been 3 months old’ or ‘last month this time…’

Born on a Thursday…
Gone on a Friday…
We mourned on Saturday & Sunday
and every other day…

You had a broken heart
You broke ours too
and left
even before my stitches healed

I never got to feed you
I kissed you just once
I didn’t hold you enough
These will haunt me forever

I never tied your shoelace
I never made you that healthy snack
I never tucked you in bed
I never told you stories

The Irish cap
The French shirt
Those flipflops from Brazil
stay unused

I see you when I’m awake
I see you when I’m asleep
I feel you with every beat
my heart takes…

I still hold my belly
only to know there’s nobody kicking

It’s been a month
It’s been a lifetime…

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Author: Mother that isn't

Would you call yourself a mother when your only child dies? My son, Ayden, born with a Congenital Heart Disease called TGA, underwent an open heart surgery at 7 days old and passed away when he was almost a month old. This blog is an attempt to document all the major emotional ups & downs of losing your own child. With no intentions to be rude, I genuinely wish people understood the emotions a little better! https://motherthatisnt.wordpress.com/

6 thoughts on “Born & gone a little too early!”

  1. A beautiful poem. I am sorry for your loss. My daughter lived 52 days. She also had congenital heart disease. 3 holes. But other issues as well. She was never healthy enough to operate on. My heart is with you.

    Liked by 1 person

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